


Reconciliation

by LightningE



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: I had to after tonight’s episode, M/M, my take on Callum’s birthday party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:09:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23287561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LightningE/pseuds/LightningE
Summary: Ben knows that he hurt Callum and he’s planning to apologize with a grand gesture.
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Kudos: 67





	Reconciliation

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I haven’t written in so long so just want to apologize if this is not so good. Please let me know what you think about it. You can find me on tumblr as: benbitchhell 
> 
> Enjoy :)

It’s Callum’s birthday and Ben knows that he should out-do himself in every way possible. It’s not that it is the first birthday they will spend together or that Callum’s turning 29 which is a pretty big deal. But Ben has been a literal pain in the ass for the past few weeks and he made Callum’s life way harder than it should be.

Ben had doubts when they first started this. He knew that he wasn’t good or pure enough for Callum to be with but Callum had chosen him anyway. Callum had stood by him through every obstacle they met, and showed Ben how much he loved him in many ways. 

On the other hand, Ben had been distant. He wanted to say the mighty three words many times but something always stopped him. A thought, perhaps, in the back of his mind screaming at him that saying the words would only hurt Callum as Ben would be giving a promise that he’s not so sure he can keep. 

It wasn’t as Ben wasn’t feeling it, his every fibre was filled with pure love for the other man. Ever since the night that Callum first kissed him, Ben knew that there was no going back. That his feelings were not the kind to just evaporate over time. He knew that he would do anything to have Callum and make him happier than he’s ever been. Ben hadn’t been keeping his promise to himself...

That’s why tonight is a big celebration at the Albert with all of their friends and family. After Ben came to his senses, he spoke with Stuart about organizing the party he was going on about and they brought it to life together.

“You know, I wasn’t so sure that you’d do a good job Mitchell.” Stuart faces Ben to make sure he understands what he’s saying. “But this is honestly great. He’ll love it.” 

Ben just lets out a breathy thanks and gets back to making sure that everything is perfect. Jay had texted Ben to let him know that him and Callum were on their way from the Cokers. They would be here any minute. 

Just when he’s sure that everything is as good as it can be, Jay texts him to say that they’re outside. 

“Tina! Music, now!” Ben shouts from where he’s standing at the entrance of the bar. Tina turns on the mandatory happy birthday song and Callum and Jay walk in. Everyone starts singing at the sight of Callum, a genuine smile on their face and adoration in their eyes. Callum is truly an amazing guy, Ben thinks to himself.

“Wow everyone thank you!” Callum says and starts hugging around the bar, taking everyone’s well wishes and thanking them kindly in return. His eyes settle on Ben after a moment and time happens to freeze for the two of them. 

Callum looks at Ben with sadness in his eyes. The last time they spoke was not a conversation but more of a screaming match at each other. Ben had let out his frustrations on Callum, again, and said some awful words that Callum didn’t deserve at all. 

Callum had refused to get in touch with Ben after that. His body ached with the need to be with him, to help him get a handle on his deafness and adjust to it but Ben had honestly hurt Callum too much this time. 

Ben knew that he screwed up as well, and didn’t want to get on Callum’s doorstep with just an apology on his lips. He knew that it would be enough for Callum who had been willing to take only as much as Ben would give throughout their relationship, but it wouldn’t be enough for Ben. He wanted to prove to Callum that he cared about the taller man as much as he was being cared for. 

At seeing the sadness in Callum’s eyes, Ben’s confidence faltered for a moment. He considered just wishing a simple happy birthday and walking out the door to let the birthday boy enjoy himself with his friends. But Ben couldn’t do it. The past week was literal hell for him. He searched for Callum at night in bed, he reached for him when he knew he was not close enough to be reached. Ben had somehow become dependent on the other man and he needed to hold him as soon as possible.

Gathering up whatever courage was left in him, Ben slowly approached Callum. 

“Happy birthday.” simple, not enough

Callum’s eyes shined a little more with every step Ben took. He muttered out a “thank you” with a soft smile that was reserved only for Ben. 

Ben knew that he should have started apologizing instantly but all that left his mouth was “I hope you enjoy your party.” 

Callum was patient, he thanked Ben again for putting it all together and waited for the younger man to continue. 

Ben was left speechless though. He had visioned this moment many times in his head for the past week, even dreamt about it. He had practiced what to say once he was here but now that he actually was, all that he could think about was how much he loved the man standing in front of him and how he would give the world to be able to hug him right now. 

After a moment of searching through Ben’s eyes for a sign, Callum turned around when he realized that this was all he was going to get from Ben. Luckily, seeing Callum walk away ignited a fire in Ben. He quickly grasped Callum’s arm to stop him from going any further.

Once Callum was fully turned to him, Ben slid his hand to Callum’s palm and drew a quick breath. This was it. All or nothing. 

“Don’t go. Callum, I am so sorry. I know that I haven’t been the greatest boyfriend and that I lashed out all my anger at you. You didn’t deserve it. You had been by my side through all of this mess and you have been nothing but supportive.” 

“Ben, it’s okay.”

“No, no it’s not. I love you Callum. I might not have always shown it or said it before but I love you. I love you more than anything else and I would do anything to take it all back. You have to know that I didn’t mean a single word that I said the other day. You are amazing, you always have been.”

Ben takes a look around the faces at the bar, listening in on their intimate conversation. “I guess this party is a way for me to show you how much I care about you. This is the first birthday that we get to spend as a couple and I wanted you to have a perfect one. Because I do care about you Callum. And I understand if you need time to forgive me, but I need you to know that I love you. I always have.”

Both of their eyes are filled with tears now. Callum takes a step closer to Ben, blue eyes never leaving the other man’s even bluer ones. 

“I don’t need time, Ben.” Ben looks up with hope glimmering in his eyes. 

All he can let out is a shaky little “No?”. 

“No. I just need you to hug me. I love you. I know that all this process has been hard on you but I never doubted for a second that you loved me Ben. You do make me feel it. You make me feel loved and cared for and just so beautiful. I love you.”

Ben doesn’t waste a second. He leaps forward to press his lips against Callum’s. After a moment of tasting his boyfriend after so long, he draws back and looks right into Callum’s eyes.

“I love you so much.” Is the last thing Ben says before holding Callum in his arms. Ben promises himself to never take this feeling for granted. 

They spend the night in each other’s arms.


End file.
